McSweeney’s List (21 May 2025)
I'm sure I've written about this before. A peek behind the curtain would reveal that I don't check to see if I've already discussed something, because if it's coming up again it's in the air, the lesson hasn't been learned, or I've had a new thought about it. Plus, in the forthcoming book (or books) of my compiled essays (ahem, six seasons and a movie), essays of a feather would do well to flock together.
Today's subject is gratitude. An attitude of gratitude, to be specific. Gratitude is an oft tossed around word these days, coming in the form of self aggrandizing social posts hashtagged blessed, proliferated through self help books and folks; it's enough to make people who really need the power of gratitude to roll their eyes and avoid the concept.
A lot of people dabble in gratitude. Perhaps they got their hands on a book that suggested it: they make a quick list of their blessings, set it aside, continue their lives, wondering why the act of enumeration didn't change them. It's akin to going to the gym once a month and wondering why nothing's different, and it's hard every time. The payoff comes when gratitude is ingrained in you.
I don't remember when I started being grateful. Somewhere between the religious texts, and nouveau spiritually, I got slow boiled into it. It probably started simply, with ads about starving children and news of war torn countries, and without having the term yet, I had the sensation of there but for the grace of God go I. We all have that period where we feel like we were born in the wrong era or wrong place, but at some point, that shifted for me. I realized that as a woman, there are so few times or places when me being me to the fullest degree of myself would've been detrimental. In the 60s, one of my favorite slices of time, I still could've been lobotomized for being a difficult (read complicated) woman. Before birth control, any career goals I might've had would've been thwarted by a brood of children, and probably a marriage that would've stifled my soul. Even now, the freedom and safety I have is directly thanks to being born in Canada in this time frame. It's a blessing I'm grateful for. But isn't it just dumb luck? Sure, but even if it is, I'm still grateful for it.
So often I find myself looking for something, on the verge of panic; my keys, my wallet, whatever. And as soon as I find it, I say thank you. To whom?! I don't know, God? The Universe? I'm not sure when I started that, but it happens naturally now, the thanks whispering out of my relieved smile, and I'm grateful. The other day I lost my bank card while out and about with a friend. I was amazed as I watched myself react. Sure, I was stressed, and my mind ran through the potential losses, what I could do in the moment, all that jazz. I locked my card from my phone, and carried on. How great is it that I can lock my card from my phone? How great is it that I lost one card and not my wallet or my phone? My friend was impressed: she hadn't been sure how I would react. Would our night shift drastically? Would I pitch a fit, like some folks we know would, and need consoling? None of that. And as I sat feeling lucky and thankful for all the ways I could mitigate the situation -- and how much worse it could've been -- I became grateful for my own handling of it. There were incarnations of my past self that would've dropped that ball (in addition to the bank card, ffs). As such, I was able to smile to myself and enjoy the sunset, grateful that I have grown, and continue to do so.
Regardless of the way we speak about manifesting -- memes and one liners have made it cliché -- it's real. If you focus on what you're missing, you're programming your brain to continue to miss it. That's a scarcity mindset, and we end up with weird knots about money, success, and relationships. If we are truly thankful for what we have, it grows. Certainly, as we consider the things we're grateful for, we begin to take steps towards those things. But those steps are suddenly effortless and joyful. And yes, I believe that The Universe is there to assist, with like attracting like, and the way the path ahead will open up in ways you never imagined.
Now, here's the catch. Being happy with what you have has an edge that can be accidentally cut into the feeling of not deserving more. Being happy to be where you are can sometimes corner you into being happy somewhere you shouldn't be. Just because you're grateful for morsels, doesn't mean you should allow yourself to subsist on scraps. Being content with a little should not be confused with being worth only a little.
Take for example, that time I had a sweet gig at a cute yoga spot. I had been calling around looking for anything that would pay me to be in the yoga vibe, and when I found one, it felt like a dream. Yes, it was a pay cut, but I was trading money for higher living. I got the gig before the studio opened its doors, and quickly became indispensable. Years later, when the place was obviously making money, it was clear that they didn't feel I was worth a raise. And that's when I dipped. It was hard: it had become such a big part of my life, but money aside, the fact that they didn't seem to see my value there suddenly made me feel foolish.
It's important to remember that the same goes for our social interactions. If we're ok receiving the bare minimum from someone, it's vital to put some boundaries in place and know that the situation is temporary. You cannot keep accepting the least forever. You, Dear Reader, are worth so much more than that. I invite you to be grateful for the smallest things in your life, but to remember that you have as much worth as the richest person and the moon itself. Shrinking yourself can be a game we play for a moment, to have the experience, but never confuse it with reality.
Do not spend time in rooms where you don't feel welcome. In fact, if they wouldn't send you an embossed invite on good cardstock, they don't want you enough, so even if you want to go, dip early and don't get stuck. If people offer only some of themselves, take it or don't: if you take it, for the plot, or whatever reason, remember that it's temporary. You don't need to starve your heart to fit their limited abilities, so get your laughs in, but keep your boots on.
Be grateful that you have so much to give, and the capacity to receive so much. Know that just because you appreciate the rain, doesn't mean you have to stand in a downpour to prove anything to anyone, least of all yourself.
Goddamn you're beautiful. And I'm grateful to be writing this for you.
the buzz is undeniable
It’s Fringe season, and we’re thrilled at the response to our THIRD ANNUAL “Forget The Box x FringeMTL Review Lottery”. We’ve got a solid team in place, and we’re excited to see what the creators and artists have to offer this year. Whether you’re a FringeMTL artist, or know someone who is, make sure to pass along the information, we don’t want anyone to lose out on this opportunity!
For more information, and to submit your production, go HERE.
Tonight!
Laughter takes over Peel Pub tonight with Open Mic Comedy! Join host Erik Intrevado as he keeps the ducks in a row (or tries to herd pigeons, depending on the day). It's a guaranteed fun time, and you should totally go.
Show up / sign up.
Additional drop-in spots available on a first come, first served basis.
Plus drink specials for comedians and audience members!
WHAT: Open Mic Comedy at the Peel Pub
WHERE: Peel Pub, 1196 Peel St., Montreal, H3B 2T6
WHEN: Wednesday, May 21, Sign up @ 830 PM, Show @ 9 PM
METRO: Peel (Green) & Bonaventure (Orange)
DETAILS: Facebook
Theatrics
Cabaret is set in early 1930s Weimar Berlin, where the thriving queer nightlife of the Kit Kat Klub stands in stark contrast to a nation on the brink of fascism. Led by the charismatic emcee and star performer Sally Bowles, the club offers a dazzling escape, while outside, the world grows darker. Amidst this turbulence, American writer Cliff Bradshaw arrives in Berlin, drawn into a world both intoxicating and dangerous. As personal and political tensions rise, Cabaret forces us to question our role as observers and how easily we can be seduced by spectacle while reality unravels.
Contact’s iteration of Cabaret is an urgent reflection on the dangers of complacency in the face of growing authoritarianism, asking audiences how long they can ignore the storm outside before they find themselves engulfed in it.
There will be a bilingual talk back on Emerging Arts following the Friday, May 23 performance.
Right Up My Alley
Live standup comedy featuring comedians from Montreal and beyond! Featuring Ray Resvick, Sean Carson, Becca Redden, Elspeth Wright, Abby Stonehouse, Guled Abdi, and Lauren Mallory.
It starts with comedy, and keeps going with a karaoke party!
There will be amazing drink deals as well as chicken wings AND poutine!!!
WHAT: The Dopest Open Mic
WHERE: Bar JamrockMtl, 8753 Lajeunesse St., Montreal, H2M 1R7
WHEN: Thursday, May 22, Doors @ 730 PM, Show @ 8 PM, Karaoke Party @ 10 PM
METRO: Creamazie (Orange)
DETAILS: Facebook
Poetics
Join us for the dual-launch of poetry collections No One Knows Us There by Jessica Bebenek (Montreal) & Familial Hungers by Christine Wu (Halifax). The poets will read from their new collections alongside poetry by Liz Howard (Letters in a Bruised Cosmos) and music by Andrew Whiteman (Broken Social Scene) as Poets Workout Sound System. Come for the poetry, stay for the party!
Free entry, books available for sale.
BYOB
WHAT: 'No One Hungers' Tour: Montreal Launch!
WHERE: DM Jessica for location (secret parties are the best parties)
WHEN: Thursday, May 22, Doors @ 7 PM, Readings @ 730 PM, Music @ 830 PM
World’s Smallest Comedy Night has so many cool things happening, so here are their events this week in order!
What Do You Know? Like, Seriously…
Tonight! Come to Hurley's for Trivia Night, and get bonus laughter! The theme for this week is The Simpsons! Grab a pint, enjoy delicious pub fare, and get ready to show off your trivia skills. Grab your team, and enjoy this night of comedy, friendly competition, and great company! Hosted by Vance Michel, this week features Peter Bowen, ShoSho Abotouk, Nazeer Khan.
WHAT: Trivia Night at Hurley's
WHERE: Hurley's Irish Pub, 1225 Crescent St., Montreal, H3G 2B1
WHEN: Every Wednesday @ 8 PM
METRO: Lucien l'Allier (Orange) & Guy-Concordia (Green)
RSVP: Eventbrite
West Side Representation
Thursday, head West for more killer comedy!
Get ready to laugh your socks off at Rustik Pub & Grill with Cheap Laughs!
Montreal's most talented comedians and touring pros hit the stage at the legendary local haunt, Rustik. Make your East-side friends come to your part of town for a change, or come explore the NDG for yourself! It's a chill and hilarious night every time.
This week, they're once again giving you top shelf comedy at rock bottom prices! Troy Stark hosts this killer lineup, featuring Walter Lyng, Joanna Selvarajah, Michael Pecker, Shawn Stenhouse, Mike Meo, Serag Meletian, Nash Taved, and Abby Stonehouse.
WHAT: Cheap Laughs at Rustik Pub
WHERE: Rustik Pub & Grill, 5621 Sherbrooke St. W., Montreal, H4A 1W4
WHEN: Thursday, May 22, Doors @ 7 PM, Show @ 8 PM
METRO: Vendôme (Orange)
TICKETS: Eventbrite
Classic Coke - Femme Edition
World's Smallest Comedy Femme Edition is this week! A lineup of funny ladies, and brassy broads, so come get in on the giggles and guffaws!
Hosted by Abby Stonehouse, the lineup features Florence Penicaud, Dawn Mcsweeney (hey, that's me!), Rose-Ingrid Benjamin, Elspeth Wright, Tina Cruz, Raquel Maestre, Naga Thovinakere, Sharon Beaumont, Shosho Abotouk, and Louise Gingras.
WHAT: The World's Smallest Comedy Night - Femme Edition
WHERE: Hurley's Irish Pub, 1225 Crescent St., Montreal, H3G 2B1
WHEN: Monday, May 12 Doors @ 7 PM, Show @ 8 PM
METRO: Lucien l'Allier (Orange) & Guy-Concordia (Green)
TICKETS: Eventbrite
Dirty Monday
The Monday Night Dirty Mic is the place to be! Hosted by Vance Michel, every show is an unpredictable and unique experience as a hilarious collection of comedians from newbs to pros take the stage. See the best before anyone else, and catch seasoned locals doing their freshest funnies!
Comics: show-up, sign-up.
WHAT: Monday Night Dirty Mic
WHERE: Hurley's Irish Pub, 1225 Crescent St., Montreal, H3G 2B1
WHEN: Every Monday, Sign-up @ 1020 PM, Show @ 1030 PM
METRO: Lucien l'Allier (Orange) & Guy-Concordia (Green)
McSweeney’s List drops every Wednesday with the best events, workshops, and more, each week in Montreal!
